I often catch myself telling people how I would handle certain situations differently if I only had one baby. Once I got over the shock of finding out I was pregnant for the second time, I remember thinking, “one newborn should be a breeze compared to twins.” Maybe it would, and maybe it would not; I may never know what it’s like. What I do know is that being a twin mom means cutting corners in any way you can to save time in this fast-paced society we live in. So, for funsies, here’s a list of things I think I would do differently if I were not a twin mom.
If I only had one baby:
- I would use cloth diapers instead of disposables. Actually, Joshua and I bought one diaper to get an idea of what it would be like. I thought it would be much easier and cheaper. Plus, using cloth would have helped Hubby out since I’m responsible for laundry, and he’s responsible for trash. But, once we found out we were having twins, we started stocking up on disposables. Twice the trash doesn’t take up as much time as twice the laundry. I’ve used my one little cloth diaper maybe five times.
- I would have had one BIG baby. My babies weighed between 5 lbs 11 oz and 6 lbs 4 oz at birth. If you tack on two more pounds for the likely four more weeks I would have carried him or her, plus the extra space he or she would have had available to grow, I probably would have given birth to a baby weighing 8 lbs or more. When I saw my oldest for the first time, my first thought was, “she’s so tiny.” Of course people have healthy 5-6 lb babies all the time, but in my family, six pounds is tiny.
- I would go out more. I would never hesitate to load baby up and run errands or even go out to dinner with my husband. But with twins, especially now that they total four, we have to plan out grocery shopping to the finest detail before we leave the house. Plus, we have to tack on an extra thirty minutes or so to any outing to account for loading and unloading our little ones and the slew of questions from strangers about our Quad Squad.
- I would allow more freedom. It seems that keeping up with one mobile child would be easier since he or she can only go in one direction at a time. Each of my twins has a mind of their own, and they almost never synchronize. Anyone with a toddler knows they can go from safe to broken limb in a split second. In order to keep them safe, I often have to keep them in a confined area at home, or in their stroller when we are not home.
- I would wear my baby. I love the idea of being able to do whatever I need to do throughout the day while wearing my baby, but with two babies, that’s a little tricky. I’m sure it’s possible, but I have not mastered the skill. I do have a Moby Wrap, and I do use it to go on walks, but I can’t do any sort of bending or lifting while comfortably balancing an extra 20-something pounds in front of me. It’s like being pregnant all over again, except the babies were probably safer on the inside.
- I would never send my baby to the church nursery. I am so very grateful for the ladies (and men) who serve The Lord in this way. However, I believe in teaching children by example how to be reverent, how to listen (not just hear), and how to take notes in church for reflection and discussion as a family outside of church. We started leaving my older twins in the nursery when they were three months old or so because my husband and I realized we were both spending more time tending to their needs than being good examples of how to behave in church. So, for now, we only bring them into the congregation occasionally.
This list is not of complaints. I love being a twin mom. Being a mom is not an easy job, and it is not a job to be taken lightly. It’s tough with only one baby. It’s certainly tough with two, or four, or more. Furthermore, I have no clue if I would actually do any of these things, because God’s plan for me didn’t allow for only one baby. God’s plan is always greater than we can imagine. If you’re a parent, thank God for your blessing(s) today, no matter their age. And, give back to God what He gave to you: your child(ren). It doesn’t really matter what kind of diapers you use, or whether you carry/stroll, or how your child/children exited your body. Those are commands of the world. God commanded us to make disciples of our children. That’s one area of parenthood that leaves no room for cutting corners, no matter how big or small your brood.
I’m not sure if these verses are commonly used in reference to raising Christian children, but I think they are spot on: